On Wednesday, I was fingerprinted at Triple A. I need a background check for my residency and that's exactly what I did. The whole ordeal took around 20 minutes, and I went back to work. There is not too much of note other than this detail. I listened to Bobok by Dostoyevsky, it was mentioned in How To Read Lacan by Slavoj Zizek; which is certainly an interesting read (you can read the book for free here or do what I did and listen to Oskar’s wonderful narration of the book, linked here) and I began listening to some of the first books of The Republic and the relevant videos from that Adam Rosenfeld Ancient Philosophy course I've been watching. This course has really helped me withstand the summer. As much as I do not enjoy actual coursework (regardless of course topic; I have only really enjoyed maybe 5 classes during my entire academic "career"). As a kid, I always wanted to enjoy things that are smart - some of this enjoyment is based in actual enjoyment of activites that are deemed as smart rather than from just being seen as smart however that latter was certainly a factor that I've wrestled with in determining my actual enjoyment of said activites. For example, in high school I signed up for Chemistry so I could be really good at it and 16-year-old me had this idea about writing really interesting lyrics that made chemistry references. This was a dumb idea, because 16-year-old me did not understand that you do not need to fully understand something to make an intelligent reference to said topic, this idea is the basis for several unforunate comedians’s careers; Hopefully I am not dropping off this point and hopefully I have clarified this point enough. Anyways, since I was a kid, I have wanted to be a rockstar and a smart person. As a kid, the info that Brian May from Queen has a PHD in Astrophysics would've been helpful - however, I believe I have done fine with combining my interest in several academic fields into my songwriting and have become in a sense this "rockstar and a smart person" that I have always wanted to be. It should be stated that there is a certain fear of fraudalence within being smart, because one aspect of intelligence is to be aware of one's own stupidity, however I believe this fear of fraudlence stems from my Generalized Anxiety Disorder and should be taken with a grain of salt (on my end) due to me being 23 and lacking that life experience to really discern things too specifically. I just have this memory in my head of buying a newton’s cradle at the Charleston mall when I was a kid and proclaiming that I wanted to be a neuroscientist. I find people like Dr. Andrew Van Der Vaart interesting, however I more or less just enjoy the psychoanalytical component of neuroscience more than the actual scientific aspect.
On Thursday, I saw K. It was the last day I would see her for a while, so I was a little depressed. Me and her had a cozy day in, and we spent together and it was really nice. I stayed a little longer than usual and she felled asleep on me while I played Fruit Merge. She is quiet when she sleeps and it is very adorable. When I woke her up she was pretty out of it but she walked me out and it was sweet. She ended up going right back to sleep and I went to bed shortly after getting home.
On Friday I went to work and then I worked a full day. I listened to The Apology and Crito by Plato. I only really remember the "plot" elements (i.e. Socrates's defends himself in court and Socrates talks to Crito), although Michael Surgue has mentioned that getting through the Republic for the first time is a slog. I think this is true, so I am unsure how much more I will read. My plan is to read a little of Plato for what is required for that Ancient Philosophy course and then move on, although I do find Michael Surgue's lectures on the Republic rather insight so I may just read the book to add the required context of those.
On Friday, a zine was posted in which I was interviewed by my friend Rabid, I’ve placed my article here:
I think I did fairly well with my answers, and I referenced what I find interesting enough to point towards something if anyone liked my music and wanted to dive into some of those inspirations. I didn’t wax poetic about Haneke or DFW or Bresson too much, which is good enough for me to feel like a great interviewee. Anyways, I was surprised that I was this interested in listening to the dialouges so I persisted while working. I left work at about 4:30 PM and got home. Mom and my sister were packing for vacation and I read and then played Minecraft. I went to bed around 9PM.
Yesterday was Saturday and my family left around 10 AM. Before my family left, I scrolled through Instagram reels for about an hour and I saw a lot of those like spooky reels about tornadoes and things like Dead Man Walking Tornadoes and/or the Joplin Butterfly People intermixed with that clip of that weather guy saying “Jesus Please Help Them” and it’s all creepy. Anyways, when I finally got up I talked to my sister about tornadoes and I was impressed about how much she knew about them (She’s 10). I hope she keeps that interest up and really persues meteorology or something similar. I ended up watching a Tornado Iceberg video; I thought about getting one of the Joplin Butterfly drawings tattooed for my sister possibly. After my family left, I read quite a bit and then I went to Subway and got an Egg Sandwich on Italian Herbs and Cheese, Provolone Cheese, Banana Peppers, Onions, and Black Olives. It was a very good sandwich. I also purchased some BBQ Chips and some Turkey Pot Pies. From here I came home and read for a little bit and then tried to take a nap. My dog Tazia kept waking me up by barking at nothing (I mean this literally) and I then I practiced guitar. I've been working on some classical tremolo alongside some different guitar pieces: Schumann's Traumerei and Bach's Jesu, Joy of Man's Desiring. At about 6PM, I started playing Minecraft and I defeated the Enderdragon. To celebrate, I ate more than one Turkey Pot Pie and estimated 53 BBQ chips. This would cause me to feel ill and go to bed.
Today was Father’s Day; I woke up and read for a little bit and then I went to my dad’s house. We drove up to Charleston to pick up my step-sister and then we went to Quaker steak - which is a good restaurant. I am some hot wings and they were very good. We headed home and I took a nap in the car, which I haven’t done since the tour I went on with Blue Shell. I got home at about 5PM, and I felt a little bad because my dog was in her crate the whole day, so I made sure to chase her and play catch with her. I started writing this blog and I soon fell asleep to Barely Sociable’s new video.
My dad is an alright feller; me and him have had our ups and downs but he tries. I don’t see him as much as I should but in my defense it has been quite busy. I love him, he’s a good guy. Here’s a pic of me and him fishing when I was little:
Goodbye.